ireallythought

An inside perspective on nursing homes and how they can affect you.

My first job working with the elderly was when I started at a nursing home during Covid-19. When I went to apply I was eager and excited to be doing work that didn’t involve trying to sell something to someone. It involved a greater sense of care and attention to detail. More one on one time and the ability to create relationships. Since it was during Covid-19 and they may have been desperate for help because I ended up getting the job.

My first day training I was up and working by six in the morning. I watched each interaction and payed great attention to detail. The lady who was training me was around my age, but had some good time in the field. To be totally honest I was swept off my feet. I saw life, life at its last point, and was humbled to my core. The initial reaction was to cry and crawl into a corner to hide. So many thoughts ran through my head and as the day went on I saw why people decided to do these kind of jobs. It was the difference you were making in the end of someone’s life.

Imagine you and your partner are working and your parent suddenly takes a fall. You have just found out that they have broken their hip and will need constant care due to lack of movement in their hands. What do you do? Well usually the answer is a retirement community. Not only do they have constant care, they also have others their age to talk and interact with. But what is it really like? Your two hour visit probably seemed very informative and you felt as if you had a grip on things. Well your a little behind because a lot goes on behind those four walls.

Each residents needs are based upon evaluations that are performed to test ADL’s. ADL stands for activities of daily living. What does your loved one basically need help with? Is it hand to mouth, eating? Sitting down and standing up? Just a lot of things we take for granted. As they unfortunately decline the ADL list grows longer. The need for briefs and toileting comes in and life becomes a challenge for them. The body reverses and forgetfulness kicks in, and that is what brings us to the topic of dementia.

That word can bring conversations to a halt and thoughts swirling to those who know someone or have known someone with it. Dementia is one of the hardest things to watch especially a loved one go through. It grips their mind in a manner that takes their personalities, voices, and memories from them in a matter of time. The feeling in my gut when I saw a parent not recognize their child was nauseating. My heart hurt to see the child’s face as their parent stared blankly at them. The person that was there for them their whole life was gone, only a person psychically there.

Dementia added a whole new outlook to my perspective and that perspective turned into a deep empathy for them. I came into work every day ready to give these people everything I had in my soul. Every time I transferred them into bed I lifted them with all my strength and placed them into bed like caring for my own parents. It was a lot but it gave me an immense amount of maturity and value for my life and others.

I personally believe that life has moments that make it worth living and I have had so many of those since starting my time in this field. The happy moments out weigh the sad and well it makes me want to walk in those four walls, day after day. I am honoring my elders, getting out of myself, and learning to appreciate life. Facing the challenges of life can be difficult, but I strive to be a person who takes them head on with others.

Although it can be heartbreaking, my work is never finished as life goes on and everyone grows old. We must remember to cherish our time and develop a sense of appreciation for what we have and have had. Wether that is a person’s life or a moment in time, we should never take anything for granted.

-g